Camels, mountains, weddings and rabbis

Six months ago, if you told me that I would be spending Shabbat at a rabbi's house in the middle of Jerusalem, I would have asked if you were crazy. Or I would have asked if he had a hot daughter. But here I am, in the middle of Jerusalem, digesting three huge meals eaten in the home of a rabbi, who coincidentally has two gorgeous daughters--both married. But don't worry, I haven't had a spiritual upheaval, I met this rabbi through the trip. One or two of us students are paired with a local rabbi to chat for an hour a day. It's supposed to be a Jew & A about religious issues, but for me it's really more of a game of "stump the rabbi." I couldn't. Nonetheless, we hit it off and he invited me over to his house for the weekend. Just like the last Shabbat, I ate, I slept, I ate, I pooped. That's about it. As an aside, the cab driver on the way over tried to pimp some 16 year old girls to me. Sometimes I forget that I'm in the middle east, and then shit like that happens.

But I get ahead of myself, over the last few days, I've ridden a camel, climbed a mountain, drank with the trip rabbis (alcohol is ok with the Jews, sex too), toured nature preserves, floated in the dead sea and crashed a wedding.

So, the camel was an adventure. After my horseback experience in Argentina, I'm not quite back to trusting quadripeds, but I gave it a shot. The "saddle" amounted to little more than a sheet of leather (no stir-ups), and the beast was, well, a beast. Stubborn, unpredictable, and surly. Woo hoo.


Believe me, those smiles went away very quickly.

Jewish weddings are quite a phenomenon. A friend of one of the trip rabbis got married, and we were all invited to the ceremony. You're all familiar with the glass breaking, the garter removing and the dancing, but seeing it in person was something else. The first thing that struck me was the segregation. Look at the pic, there's a divider on the dance floor separating the girls from the guys.


This is one of those situations where so many jokes rush out of my brain that they bottleneck before my fingers and nothing comes out. You can add your own commentary.

Another difference between an orthodox wedding and others is that the guests are supposed to entertain the couple, not the other way around. This was done in the form of various dances, parlor tricks, flame throwers, and beat-boxing. Yes, even Snoop Jewey Jew got in on the mix, and he was actually pretty good. Bonus: I got to see all of my teachers (local rabbis) absolutely smashed. The next day's classes were a little awkward.

Speaking of Jews and booze, a few other students and I took the head rabbi out to a Hooka bar. For those of you who don't know what a Hooka is, it's like a bong with tobacco in place of weed (not that I've ever used either). If any religion has a chance of flying with me, there are certain prerequisites that must be met, and this is definitely one of them.


Yesterday, we were woken up at 2 am to drive to an ancient mountain fort in the south of Israel. Sunrise is a popular time to climb the mountain (for good reason), and was well worth the wake up call. Take a look:






I've climbed mountains a few times before, but never in 100 degrees of serious humidity. Needless to say, I stunk like a homeless man running a marathon. To de-funk, we took a dip in the Dead sea. For someone who has never been able to float before (being skinny has a price), this was quite a religious experience. That is, until the extreme salinity devoured every opening on my body: cuts, mouth, eyes, and others that I don't need to elaborate on. But suffice it to say, I've never enjoyed a shower quite as much as the one that I took when I got out.

Afterwards, we headed to a nearby nature preserve. I snapped a few pics. Enjoy.




Ok, I think that brings us up to date. I've got a few more big days coming up, so I'll try to check in soon.

Myles

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