A few thousand words about Israel

[This is post 3 of 3 for the day, so scroll down if you haven't read the others.]

A pretty standard Israeli scene: white shirts, cheap food, beautiful soldiers.


Airport or shopping mall?


Market adaptation.


Jew-itos.


A high-school field trip with assult rifles.


Where am I?


Three peoples, three languages, one powder keg.


P.S. These are the pics from a few posts ago that weren't working:

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Pant Shitting at 500 Feet

Today, in an apparent effort to scare us into prayer, the group organizers took us repelling near the Dead Sea. There's not much more to say, so take a look.

Putting things in perspective:


My sister, Arielle, for those of you that don't know her:



Some goober crapping himself:

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Terminally Undeclared

Unlike Argentina, I haven't had much free time to just sit down and write on this trip. Accordingly, my posts have been nothing more than straight-forward activity lists. Those types of posts are no fun to write, and presumable no fun to read. But I'm finally over the jet lag, so I'm going to skip a nap and explain something. I hope it's worth it.

So the story today, kids, is about the Jewish phenomenon of yeshivas. Anyone who read Chaim Potok in middle school knows about kibbutzes--essentially self-contained Jewish farm communitites. We're talking circumsized hippies, here. Yeshivas are a similar concept, just replace working with studying, and you've got it. Men of all ages come from all over the world to give up material trappings and read the Torah together. Fun stuff.

A few things probably come to mind, like where does the money come from? Kibbutzes can grow their own food, or at least make stuff to sell, but yeshivas don't make much more than introverts. The solution? Everything has a benefactor. The only thing that rich American Jews like more than Barbara Streisand is their names on shit. The Seth Berger study center. The Samuel Cohen door handle. The Abe Goldstein urinal. You get the idea.

The other thing you might be wondering is, why? I can think of a trillion things more interesting than studying ancient Jewish law, to say nothing of the no-sex issue, but the Jewish culture places a very high emphasis on learning. Hence the disproportionate number of ivy-leaguers. So, at first I though, "Wow, these guys are really into their beliefs." And a few guys training to be rabbis really are. But it seems like the vast majority of them are the type of guy that still didn't have a major by senior year. The type that gets tripped up over paper or plastic. These guys haven't decided to devote their lives to Judaism, they haven't decided shit! Here comes along a school that is not only free, but it pays you ($500-$3000/month)! The men in these centers have wives, they have kids, but they don't have jobs. Seems off to me.

Is that lightning forming?

M

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The greatest day of my life

That's it, I'm hooked.

So, for all the gentiles out there, the day of rest is serious business for the Jews. It starts at sundown on Friday, followed by a meal that could only be described as fit for a king. A really fat king. We're talking double-digit courses, huge quantities and homemade deserts.

I spent the evening with a local family, who offered me room and board for the weekend. We spent Friday evening after the meal talking and relaxing; writing, physical stress and making plans are prohibited. I could get used to this.

I woke up the next day (way into the next day) to find a giant tray of amazing pastries waiting for me. After slowly getting ready, I went to another family's house for a lunch that was just as big as the last night's dinner. This was followed by an equally huge third meal, and an evening walk through the neighborhood. I'm still full.

It's Sunday today--the start of the work week--so we're back in our routine, but I'm already counting down to next Friday. Resting this hard takes preparation.

Talk to you soon,
Myles

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Indiana Jewnes

Hi there,

Last night we toured underneath the wailing wall that I told you about yesterday. It's an active archeological site that's only been operating for the last couple of decades, but the area's amazing. Some of the tunnels were recently created, others are ancient aqueducts, and others are simply spaces between the wall and buildings that were built next to it. As we went deeper into the tunnels, we saw modern Jerusalem turn into remains of the Muslim, Christian, Roman, Herodian, and original Hebrew periods. We went hundreds of feet down below the current street level, to the level it was at in ancient times. This was some really cool, seriously historical stuff. In fact, a few years ago, when an entrance to the base of the temple mount was found, a very quiet operation was started to enter what was essentially the basement of the original temple. This is underneath a very important mosque, and the worldwide Muslim community went into an uproar, as they saw it as undermining their territorial possessions. The conflict quickly escalated, and within a day of starting the excavation, the UN had to step in to avoid another all out war. The entrance was filled with concrete, and that's how it remains today (I saw the actual gate, it's huge). The Jewish community was extremely disappointed, since they suspect some very important artifacts to be down there, like the Arc of the Covenant and the original gold menorah from the second temple (you know, the one of Hanukkah fame). This is such an important site (for several religions), and I'm pretty surprised at how close we got.

Today was spent walking around a huge Jewish marketplace as the locals got ready for Shabbat. It was just as you'd imagine, lots of black suit-clad men buying food and supplies from actively hawking merchants. Yet another step back in time. I've got a few pics, but my sister's got the camera cable, so I'll have to post them tomorrow.

Oh, wait, tomorrow is Saturday, the Jewish Sabbath, so everything in the city shuts down, especially internet cafes. The group has arranged for a bunch of the neighborhood families to take us in, which means good food, a real bed, and (this is the best part) no alarm clock. Very religious Jews don't drive, don't use computers, don't write, and don't worry, they just sit around and eat. This is one custom that I could really get behind.

M

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Holy Walls and Shady Markets

Ok, finally some time to write a decent post. I'll start from the beginning.

As I hinted at yesterday, the dorms that we're sleeping in are a bit, well, basic; but it's nothing that I haven't seen a dozen times over in hostels. However, some of the guys on this trip don't stay in hotels with less stars than they have fingers, so it's been kind of a shock for them. My room has 6 beds, a closet, a window (very important in the desert), and something that I suppose once resembled a lock. My bed's tiny, no surprise, but I was especially shocked when I jumped up - exhausted from traveling - and I was swallowed up by the bed frame. I'm on a top bunk, and the bed was missing its support board, so I fell through the beams, mattress and all. I knew that I wasn't going to last long without a board under my bed, so did what any resourceful traveler would do in this situation; I stole one. At the time, there was an empty bed, so I "borrowed" a board from one, and went to sleep. That is, until until one of those 5-star types barged into the room, dumped his bags, and turned on the lights. He turned on the lights! I was too tired to start a fight, plus I didn't want bad blood between me and someone with a key to my room. But I'll admit, I couldn't help but laugh when he got swallowed up by his board-less matress. Touché.

The next day (yesterday), with the dorm shenanagins behind me, we visited the Kotel - or wailing wall. It's all that's left of the original holy temple of ancient Jerusaluem. We're talking big time significance, here. It's like St. Peter's, Mecca, and Sarnath all wrapped up into one. Here are a few pics:


(In the backround are hugely significant mosques and churches. Only in Jerusalem. The mosque was actually built on the actual site of the Jewish temple; talk about adding insult to injury!)

This was one that I took last night (I live way close), it's packed during the day. Religious Jews believe that this is a direct line to God. No secretaries, no answering machines.


Here's an artsy fartsy one that I took while walking around the Jewish quarter.


So, last night we went out to the bars (it was my little sister's first legal drinking experience), and it was quite a site to see American tourists, Hassidic Jews, and armed, off duty soldiers all sharing brews. Only in Israel.


My sister got back to her place just fine, but my friend and I started noticing the signs changing from Hebrew to Arabic as we walked back. Uh oh. We were getting more than a little bit nervous, but it turns out that we were just in the Armenian quarter, only 7.4 on the dangerometer. We made it back just fine, but it was quite an adventure.

I actually went to a bazaar in the Arab quarter today, after hearing from a Rabbi that it's not too bad in during the day. Nonetheless, I didn't want to take out my camera, so you'll just have to use your imagination.

Well, I'm late for dinner, but I'll check back in soon.

Myles

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Shalom from Israel!

Hi all,

After a grueling 24 hours of flying, we made it here in once piece! First impression: not that scary. Tell my mom that. But don't tell her that our city tour today was accompanied by an assault-rifle carrying guard. Or that almost every single store has a metal detector and/or an armed guard. Or that heavily armed military personnel line every street. Basically, there are lots of guns here. Our dormitory (very generous use of the word) is located right in the heart of the old city neighborhood of Jerusalem. I'm pretty much sleeping in the heart of all major world religions. Amazing.

Time out. The Hassidic Jew at the computer next to me (you know the type, sideburns, hat, suit, etc.) just started bumping Lil' Jon on his computer. Hilarious. Are we really all that different?

Computers here are expensive and crappy (Mid-East, remember), so I'll keep it short, but I think a quick overview of the country is in order to bring everybody up to speed. There are several quarters of the city, aside of the obvious Jewish one. There's the Muslim one, the Christian one, and the Armenian one, in addition to a few smaller ones. All of them are separated by mediaeval-age walls, and stumbling through the wrong one is akin to wearing a Lynyrd Skynyrd shirt in Compton; you just don't do it. Technically speaking, however, Israel in not a religious state, but that's like saying technically, RuPaul is a man. The politics are run by Jews and the businesses are run by Jews. Thankfully, I can play for a few teams, so I just bring out whatever side is necessary.

The entire city is cordoned off by a giant metal security fence that separates it from the West Bank (the Palestinian quasi-state). Needless to say, just looking at the place could get me blown up.

I had a funny story about checking into the dorm, but I'm already racking up the Shekels here, so I'll save it for the next one. Talk to you all soon.

Myles

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I'm back!

Hi everybody,

After a 6-month adventure travel hiatus, I'm back on the road, and I couldn't be happier! This time, I'm off to Israel. Yes, that Israel. There are a few philanthropies that offer free (or cheap) trips to Israel for Jewish students, and I've hooked up with one of them. I'm going on one of the longer trips, the only catch is that I have to pay a little bit. However, it's a very little bit. I'm getting airfare, room and side trips paid for; my contribution pretty much equals what I'd be spending on food during the three weeks that I'll be traveling, and I'd be spending that no matter where I am. So, I'm essentially getting a free trip to the Middle East simply for being a member of the tribe. Seems like the circumcision was worth it.

I can already see the questions brewing, let me take a stab at a few of them.

Q: Wait a minute, are you even Jewish?
A: Technically yes, although anyone familiar with my level of Jeweyness knows that I'm quite a few candles short of a menorah. The thing is though, my Mom's a pure bred, so they can overlook the fact that my dad's from a Catholic family. Granted, if they knew that he's Lebanese too, they'd probably ex-jewmunicate me in a heartbeat. But we won't tell them that.

Q: But Myles, I thought you hated group travel?
A: You're right, I think that getting lost is half the fun of traveling (and I don't own any Hawaiian shirts, which appear to be compulsory). However, there's one thing that I hate more than prescribed itineraries, and it's getting blown the f up. I think I'll stick with the pros. But...

Q: Aren't you afraid of getting blown the f up?
A: Of course, but people travel to Israel all the time, and at least a few of them come back in one piece. Hopefully I'll be a lucky one. Besides, I'll be with a group, and terrorists would never strike a pack of wide-eyed American tourists. Especially if they're Jewish.

Oh man, what am I getting myself into?

I guess I'll see soon enough. Once I get there, I'll tell you more about the trip. At this point, I really don't know very much, except that it's free!

Now, what to pack...

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